Sunnah Method Of Marriage
12. The Walîmah
The hosting of walîmah is a sunnah of Nabî ﷺ as well as past messengers. The outstanding feature of these walimahs was simplicity. Whatever was easily and readily available would be served. According to majority of scholars, walimah is sunnah after cohabitation or at least some time spent in privacy. Some are of the view that walimah can take place after the nikâh is performed. This is referred to as malâk (see no. 3 below). The actual object of walimah is to make apparent a halal and permissible connection. The best time to perform the walimah is the day after one has spent time with his spouse. Permission is also given for the second and third day. If for some reason, the walimah could not be done at that time, then there is no harm if done later.
Walimah will remain a sunnah when these conditions are found:
1) The poor are invited – Rasulullâh ﷺ said, “The worst of food is the food of walimah in which the rich are invited and the poor are left out.” (Bukhari, Muslim)
2) The walimah is done according to one’s ability.
3) No interest-bearing loans are taken, since this person has been cursed by Nabî ﷺ, and by doing so is kept far away from the mercy of Allâh ta’ala.
4) There is no show and desire for praises and fame. Nabi ﷺ prohibited one from eating the food of those who are feeding for show and rivalry. (Abu Dâwud)
5) There is no formalities and unnecessary wastage and expenditure.
6) The walimah is done for Allâh ta’ala’s pleasure, to follow the sunnah of Rasulullâh ﷺ. The clear sign of this is that one will abstain from all sins and not do such actions which cause the anger and displeasure of Allâh ta’ala and Rasulullâh ﷺ like music, intermingling of sexes, etc.
Hereunder are a few walimahs which took place in the time of Nabî ﷺ:
1) For the walimah of Hadhrat Fâtima, radiyallahu anha, Hadhrat Sa'd, radiyallahu anhu, offered a sheep he owned (for the meat) and the Ansaar collected a few Saa of wheat (for the bread). (Tabrâni)
2) The marriage of Hadrat Aa’isha, radiyallahu anha, was consummated in her parent’s house. Neither was any camel nor any goat slaughtered for her marriage until Sa'd bin Ubaadah sent a platter of food which he usually sent to Rasulullâh ﷺ whenever he was with any of his wives. (Ahmad)
3) After Najâshi had performed the marriage of Nabî ﷺ to Hadrat Umme Habîba, the Muslims started to leave. Najâshi, radiyallahu anhu, said to them, "Do remain seated. It has been the practice of the Ambiyâ, alayhimus salam, to host a meal on the occasion of a marriage. He then sent for the food and the Muslims ate before leaving.” (Al-Bidâyah Wan Nihâyah) If a meal is given on behalf of the man before the husband and wife meet, then this is referred to as malâk, and after meeting the meal is referred to as walimah.
4) After Rasulullâh ﷺ consummated his marriage with Hadrat Safiyya, Rasulullâh ﷺ had some Hais (a sweet dish made with dates, butter and flour) prepared and served on a leather tablecloth. Hadhrat Anas, radiyallahu anhu, was then instructed to invite whoever was in the area (to partake of the food).
In another narration, Hadhrat Anas, radiyallahu anhu, states that he invited the Muslims present there to a Waleemah meal that featured neither bread nor meat. All that it consisted of was Rasulullâh ﷺ's instruction to Bilaal, radiyallahu anhu, to spread out a leather tablecloth. He then scattered some dates, cheese and butter onto it (which the people ate). (Bukhâri)
Hadhrat Jaabir, radiyallahu anhu, reports, "When we gathered at the time of Isha, Rasulullâh ﷺ came out to us carrying in the edge of his shawl close to one and a half Mudd of Ajwah dates. (Handing them over to us) Rasulullâh ﷺ said, 'Eat from the Waleemah of your mother.'" (Ahmad)
5) Nabi ﷺ had a walimah after consummating his marriage to Zainab bint Jahsh, radiyallahu anha. He ﷺ fed the people to their fill with bread and meat. (Bukhâri) Another narration states, “Nabi ﷺ did not have a walimah as he had done for Zainab, radiyallahu anha. He made walimah with a sheep. (Bukhari, Muslim) The reason for extra care in this walimah was because this nikâh was performed in the heavens by Allâh ta’ala. People would arrive, eat and then leave. Then others would enter and do likewise. There were no formalities in hiring halls, etc. Whatever was easily available was utilized according to means.
6) Rabee’ah Aslami, radiyallahu anhu, hosted a walimah in which a sheep was slaughtered and bread was given.